Remembrance
“What do you mean you’re leaving?”
The man turned facing her. Aioria had known Marin for years now, and this was the first time she had actually surprised him. He knew he could have expected anything from her, but that was something he had certainly not seen coming. Yet, the woman did not answer at once.
Marin had it all planned. She was to stay in Saori’s mansion in Japan; she wanted to know more of the place she had been born in. It was a need what was craving inside of her. The Amazon wanted to find about her own past, before being ready to give it up and—and why not, continue with her life.
“I’m leaving Aioria, that’s all.” She answered coldly. There was nothing that could have been said between them. Whatever was going on between the two of them had been happening for a long time, and she knew she was the one to be blamed. “Moving on would a great idea for both of us, don’t you think?” The words came out of her absent-mindedly. Marin was not even looking at him. She just let them spill and the man felt them flying though his heart like daggers.
Aioria stared at her. It had been months already for him trying to figure it all out. Too many a night had been spent trying to find out what was wrong with the woman he was in love with. However, he decided to let her go. Was it pride? He thought.
“Goodbye then, Marin.”
The man walked out the Goddess’ temple and went to Sanctuary’s boundaries, looking for a moment on his own. For a place he could cry his heart out, even if it was in silence.
Marin knelt in the place showing her affection to it, to Athena and finally turned, leaving it all behind. Even Aioria.
For weeks, Leo had been hiding the pain he had been going through. It was to him as if he were destined to be alone and the worse part of that was that the ones he loved always abandoned him.
Sanctuary was also going through many changes, which was somewhat a relief for him. Everybody was so busy trying to get their lives back on track, that it seemed as if they had all forgotten about the others. A blessing, he thought, for no one was paying any attention to him.
The Saints’ lives had been shaken to their very foundations. Only half of them had remained alive and one was not even at Sanctuary. It was not strange to find Milo, Aldebaran, and Mu gathering every now and then to speak about the future and sometimes, about the past. It was him, Aioria, who had decided to remain afar; walking from one side to the other—just like a caged lion would. That, of course, did not take much for Shaka to acknowledge.
Also in the past days, the future ahead was something Shaka did not dare to think about. Buddha’s apprentice would not try. The man had not meditated whatsoever, thinking it impossible at the moment. His own future was everything he could live each day. Every single thing around him, made more sense than ever before. Even his fellow Saints, the ones who like him had survived, where somewhat closer. The morning when he saw Aioria, he could feel the sadness in him.
That day, Shaka decided to visit Aioria in his Temple. It had been quite a while since the last time he had paid a visit to someone; yet, he felt it was something right to do. Aioria was a noble man, and was his closest partner as well, given that Dokho had not been in Sanctuary for along time now. Shaka smiled. It was a strange moment to think about partnership now, when the Goddess was among them and they had fought her. When so many had died—some even for no reason.
Talking was the last thing there was between them. Milo had spent his life buried in books and looking for some sort of peace for his mind. Milo, lovely Milo who could not help looking for death in any form; even if that was to die himself. He felt guilty. Shaka could see inside the youngest of them all. Scorpio felt Camus had died because of him. He had allowed Hyoga to pass to the Eleventh Temple; therefore, Camus’ death was nothing but his fault. Shaka pitied the man and knowing there was nothing else for him to do, except when Milo decided himself to let him in; he decided to leave him be.
That was why; Aioria was the perfect person for him to speak with. Even him, the man closest to God, needed someone with whom spend some time.
“Evening.” The man said quietly, just to raise his voice a little bit after a few seconds in which he got no answer. He repeated his greeting, deciding to leave after a few minutes; again, there was no answer. Turning his back to the entrance of the Temple, Shaka began to walk, back to his place.
“Shaka!” Aioria yelled, and Virgo could help but turn again, laughing for himself when saw him so scruffy. Aioria, he could determine had been sleeping; and he had woken him up.
“I’m very sorry, Aioria—didn’t know...”
“It’s ok, really.” The man answered quickly, staring at the other with a mixture of uncertainty and surprise, “it just...caught me off guard your coming here.” He spoke again, putting his hand behind his head and smiling playfully.
Shaka nodded. He understood what the other was saying, yet he did not say anything further. Aioria’s appearance had taken him off guard himself. The man was shirtless and the unbuttoned training pants allowed him to see a bit more than he had ever expected. Also, his hair, messy and his eyes still dreamy, gave him a childish look, which Virgo found alluring.
“To what do I owe the honour?” Leo asked, still yawning, not aware of the other’s stare. He was not sure whether Shaka was looking at him or not, though.
Shaka, in a very strange display smiled broadly, yet sadly. Aioria could see the faint air of nostalgia the other had. It was the first time Shaka had shown that kind of ‘weakness’ in front of anyone. He could not answer, however. Until a few moments, before walking down the stairs, everything was clear to him. He had consciously analysed each person in Sanctuary, and had decided that Aioria was the person that actually needed him, but being now in front of him, he knew it was all futile. He needed the others as much as the others might need him. Athena’s influence was present now all throughout the place, even in them—in him.
“I’m here...” he began, but it was hard for him to continue, “I really don’t know what is it that I’m doing here, Aioria.”
Leo would have liked to say something. To rebuke the other with anything that might have come out of his lips, yet he could not. Times were difficult at the moment. The transition in Sanctuary was not an easy one, and little by little all the changes had been causing more distress that he had imagined. He also realised he was not the only one going through a hard time. Until that day, Aioria had always felt he was the only one suffering; now, he had seen pain in Shaka’s attitude and in the days before, he had seen it in Milo, Mu and Aldebaran as well.
“Would you like something to drink?” The man said, moving aside so the entrance was free for Shaka to come in—if he accepted.
Virgo did not say anything whatsoever. He simply walked back, heading to the entrance of Leo and crossing its threshold. The time of healing was about to begin for everyone.
Athena had summoned Aioria to her presence very early in the morning. The man had been waiting before the chamber for almost an hour now, and nobody seemed to know what was going on inside the place since not one was able to say anything to him.
Some people hired by her, and following Tatsumi’s instructions had found a number of graves in the surroundings of Sanctuary. Tatsumi had been working, making a great effort to remember Mr. Kido’s words on the day he had found Aioros and the baby Athena so many years ago.
“Leo Master, you can come in.” The squire’s voice repeated itself repeatedly in his head. Why was he asked before the Goddess, he wondered, but that was something he was about to find out.
It was almost midnight when he left the Goddess’ temple. Aioria’s heart was beating fast. So fast, he thought it could have left his body at any time. He looked around him, seeing only the stones and rocks that formed the landscape, and the Temples surrounded by them—
Therefore, they had found him after all those years and they were bringing him back to Sanctuary.
The tears marked a path along his face, to die down his neck. The silence of the night and the moonlight served as witness of his crying. A shadow walked silently to the man, taking a known shape before him.
“Why are you weeping, Cub?”
The words—the feelings—the tears—
“Aioria! Aioria!” Virgo took him by the arms and shook him with strength. “Why are you crying, Kitten?”
He saw him clearly now. Cub. The shadow he had seen had called him Cub and he knew what it meant. Aioros was back in Sanctuary and had used Shaka’s body to show his concern. That Shaka had called him Kitten was no mystery since everyone his age used to do so. Then why—
“Aioria—”
“They’ve found my brother’s body, Shaka,” he responded whimpering, “and I still don’t know what to think of that…and…” he hesitated, bringing his hands to his face, whipping them away; then moving his hands through his hair, “they’ll bring the body tomorrow. We’re going to have a special ceremony in the evening.”
Shaka said nothing. He turned to look at the landscape before them; imitating Aioria’s posture. “How does that make you feel, Aioria?”
At the question, Leo felt the blood running fast through his body and into his head.
“How can you ask that, Shaka?!” Aioria’s voice, Shaka noticed, was full of rage. He could also sense the other’s cosmos flaring menacing. He said nothing, nonetheless. “How dare you?!” Aioria finished. His chest heavily moving up and down.
“You haven’t answered my question yet, Aioria.” Shaka’s voice was exasperatingly calm. Aioria took him by the arm, making him turn. Shaka did not react in any way, making Aioria feel impotent before him.
“I…” he began, unable to finish the sentence. He wanted to say he felt angry—or happy, the truth was he was not quite sure about it. Leo would have loved to say Aioros deserved to be back in Sanctuary and find final peace within, but the words could not take shape, becoming as heavy as an anvil.
Shaka opened his arms, and in a strange display of concern, he cuddled Aioria in them. Leo felt safe and allowed his tears to flow, “it wasn’t his fault Aioria, and it wasn’t yours either.”
“Why am I crying then?”
“Because you’re mortal.” Shaka took him by the shoulders again, “even Gods cry, Aioria. Buddha, though not a God, cried when he saw suffering in the world; he also cried when he abandoned his wife and newly born child to look for a different life, a life with a new meaning in which they weren’t included.
“The Christ of the Christians cried blood in his most desperate hour.
“Even Athena has cried. Why wouldn’t we do so, my friend?
“We’re nothing but humans, Aioria.”
Leo was looking at Virgo carefully. Listening to his every word. Making them his. Shaka was right, he knew. And saw—his heart touched by that he was seeing—that Shaka was crying as well.
“And why are you crying, Shaka?”
“Because neither of you deserved that fate, Aioria.”
It was then when Shaka opened his eyes and Aioria could see them for the first time. Virgo was right; they were nothing but humans.
* * *
Many a moon had passed since that evening in which the fallen saints had been taken before their Goddess and she had judged them, finding them innocent in their hearts. Even Death Mask and Aphrodite had been forgiven. Now, they were preparing the place for the rituals again. How would Aioros be found by the Goddess, they wondered. A hero? A saviour? A fool?
“What do you think, Aioria?”
Leo sighed heavily. Against Shaka, he knew he would never win. Virgo always made the most annoying, bizarre questions he would ever have to try to answer. He knew that was part of the other’s personality, though. Leo had been in the entrance of the Virgo’s Temple, his body leaning on a near column, thinking carefully about his response.
“I think your brother has cleaned all our sins against the Goddess.” Shaka answered his own questions, his voice sounding deep to Aioria’s ears; making him believe those words were true, “just like the Christ, you know?”
“Who?” Aioria inquired turning to look at him; a strange look of confusion showing on his face.
“Oh please, Aioria! You’re Greek, hence an Orthodox. You’re supposed to know about him!”
“Aioros…I only know Athena and the Gods of old, Shaka.”
Virgo looked at him understanding. The time was not appropriate for a lecture but for having a conversation—a good one—no matter what the topic was.
“Then let me tell you about the Christ while we walk to the Goddess’ Temple.” He answered patting Aioria on his back, “I hope you can understand my words by then.”
The path through the next three temples brought many surprises, which Aioria stored, in his heart, relieving himself from his self-imposed burden. In the ninth Temple, Sagittarius, Aioria stood in the middle of the imposing place before the entrance. The place looked awkwardly alive. Even the armour, which had been placed in there since Athena’s return looked strangely familiar. There was a moment when the overwhelming feeling in his chest took him over—and made him shiver.
Aioria hesitated before taking another step that might lead him to the armour. It was Shaka’s hand on his shoulder, which pushed him forward. Yet the place changed the moment he took that next step.
Sagittarius looked exactly the way it was during Aioros’ time. Leo could see every piece of décor his brother used to have there. The living colours and ambiance filled his senses and emotions. Then he felt him. Aioros was hurriedly coming inside the House, carrying Athena in his arms. He had been wounded. Not for a moment, did Aioria see him hesitate to go and enter the room he had occupied when he was a child.
Aioria ran after him, forgetting that Shaka was with him. The man simply followed the memories that were playing themselves for him. Inside the room, he saw himself—younger, innocent—while he was tiredly and profoundly asleep. He saw Aioros leaning over the bed, smiling at him.
‘Aio.’ Little Aioria said sleepily.
‘Hush’ Sagitta whispered, lulling them both to sleep, Athena and him indistinctively. ‘I’m sorry, Cubby…please, brother…forgive me.’ He said.
Aioria saw his brother touching his hair, as well as the saddest, bitterest smile he had ever seen on him. Yet again, the noise and the chaos that was taking place outside, warned Aioros to leave.
‘S’agapo, Liontari’* Sagitta had said and had kissed Aioria’s little self. The next thing Aioria saw, was the smile of satisfaction he had offered his big brother while he rushed to tuck him in.
Next thing, Aioros was running away and he was brought back to reality. He was still standing in Sagittarius, heavily breathing. The man looked at Shaka, who was moving his hands in an uncanny way, as if making a circle.
“Shaka…what are you doing?”
“I’m sealing the memories of Sagittarius, for I believe they’ve finally found their rightful place in your heart, Aioria.” Virgo started to walk again, inviting Aioria to follow him, which he did.
Upon arriving at the Temple of the Goddess, Athena welcomed them. Only Milo of Scorpio was missing.
“Thank you, Shaka.” The Goddess said to him, which surprised Aioria. The young woman walked to Virgo, who gave him back something Aioria could not identify at once. “Aioria,” she addressed him, “forgive me for not giving you this before, but Shaka needed it.” Athena stretched her hand had handed him a piece of red rag. “It was found around your brother’s head. I believe you might have wanted it.”
“My Lady…”
“Off you go, and sit. We’re about to begin.” Athena responded as soon as Milo entered the place.
Soon the ceremony was about to come to its end. Aioria held the piece of cloth tight in his hand. He was scared. Afraid because of everything that had happened to him in the past days. At least, he had found a name to call his brother and that was not ‘traitor’.
One by one, every Saint left the temple walking towards the little cemetery in Sanctuary. There, they found the Silver Saints, Marin included. The truth was Aioria did not even see her. He was too immersed in his own silence as to pay attention to anything or anyone else.
Marin looked at him in silence as well. She had been his companion throughout the years and seeing him was heart breaking for her. Although, that new look in the man’s eyes, took her by surprise. The woman saw him kneeling near the grave. All the ceremony, she knew, had a completely different meaning for Aioria. Eagle saw him throw a piece of cloth inside the grave, and then a handful of dry earth.
“Rest in peace, Aio.” She heard him say—and she understood. That was the familiar way for them to call one another. Aioria used to mention that to her many a year before. Marin wanted to approach him, but her own rank prevented her from doing so. Therefore, she waited.
When it was finally over, the Saint approached Aioria, smiling behind her mask. Aioria saw him coming and smiled at her, welcoming her to Sanctuary as well.
“I thought it would take you longer to return, Marin.” He said.
“Well, Japan was not what I’d expected, you know? And I believe I’m of more use here. How are you?” The woman tried to hold Aioria’s hand, in a moment she thought it suitable. Yet he did not respond to the gesture.
“Gotta go, Marin.” He finally said, turning to look at the place where Shaka was standing, “Shaka is waiting for me.” Aioria let the words spill out of his lips unnoticed, “It’s great seeing you back here.” He yelled from afar, as he reached Virgo and began walking with him.
Marin realised in Aioria’s new attitude the calmness she had never seen on him before. She knew she had been the author of that change by leaving Sanctuary. With her absence, Marin had allowed Aioria to find in Shaka what she could have never given him.
Virgo and Leo walked back to the Temples. A sort of sadness could still be sensed in the air itself, yet, Shaka knew things were different for Aioria now. At least, he had actually been able to help someone who truly needed him.
“Aren’t you going to tell me what you did in Sagittarius?”
“Just took you closer to your brother.”
“Thank you, Shaka.” Aioria made him stop to look at him when saying the words. He saw the other smiling and nodding. Soon they were in Virgo again.
Silent tears fell down Eagle’s cheeks and behind her mask. She felt that what she had always been looking for in Sanctuary had always been right in front of her eyes. And that smile on Aioria’s face—one she had never received, but that was now being offered to the Virgo Saint—the woman looked at them for the last time, before walking to her own cottage.
*I love you, Leo.
Ariadne, 2005